August 2008
17 posts
School chemistry off-limits to terrorism suspect :... →
Up next borders / barnes and nobles to start security checks prior to allowing book purchases.
(via Chris Snazell)
July 2008
24 posts
Dozens blinded in India looking for Virgin Mary in... →
falconieri:
Good job dumb asses
Excellent quote Matt!
ShoddyWiring.com →
Peoplearedumb.tumblr.com has become www.shoddywiring.com
that is all.
BBC NEWS | UK | Women try to open door mid-flight →
(via terryblakey)
NZ judge orders 'odd' name change →
(via terryblakey)
Protestor glues himself to Gordon Brown - RTÉ News →
travors:
A campaigner from the anti-climate change group Plane Stupid super-glued himself to British Prime Minister Gordon Brown during an event last night.
Hillarious!
Natural Selection In Action, Part 2
Zoo visitor: “Aren’t lions vegetarians?”
Me: “No, lions are carnivores.”
Zoo visitor: “I’m sure I read somewhere that they are vegetarians. How are they carnivores?”
Me: “Sir, lions are well known carnivores. They hunt for their food. Their diet consists of mostly meat. They would not survive on fruits and vegetables alone.”
Zoo visitor: “Are you sure about that?”
Me: *sarcastically* “Well, if you really want to you, can jump into the lion exhibit to see if they’ll eat you.”
Zoo visitor: “Vegetarians wouldn’t eat a human, would they?”
Me: “My point exactly.”
Honey, He Ain’t A Scrapbooking Project (via...
Nurse’s aide: “Can I help you?”
Daughter: “Yeah… can I have a stapler?”
(The nurse’s aide walks about two steps away to get a stapler and then thinks better of this request.)
Nurse’s aide: “Why do you want a stapler?”
Daughter: “My dad’s IV tubing is getting in his way. I thought it would be better if we stapled it to his arm.”
Nurse’s aide: “Um, I think tape would work better for that.”
Daughter: “You guys have tape here?”
Nurse’s aide: “Yeah, I have some here in my pocket.”
(The aide walks into the room to secure the IV tubing before any more of his genius children try to help.)
Daughter: *muttering* “I still think a stapler is a better idea…”
Father-of-three branded a 'pervert' - for... →
onemoretimewithfeeling:
“What is the world coming to when anybody seen with a camera is assumed to be doing things that they should not?”
“A ‘vulnerable’ man cut off his own head with a chainsaw after being ordered to...”
– Man cuts off own head with chainsaw after flat is earmarked to be bulldozed by developers | Mail Online
(via danhacker)
President George Bush: 'Goodbye from the world's... →
travors:
shadowfirebird:
‘He then punched the air while grinning widely, as the rest of those present including Gordon Brown and Nicolas Sarkozy looked on in shock.’
(Via dont’forget.)
god-damn it, that ain’t a good accomplishment
Mum's police check for school run | BBC NEWS →
shadowfirebird:
“I would be in no contact with any children other than my own child.”
“It would be a case of me going to school and catching a bus home and that’s it.”
“I really don’t understand it.”
'Body Of Christ' Snatched From Church, Held... →
pilnick:
Have you guys heard about this? The whole situation is pretty ridiculous. The short version is a UCF student went to mass, recevied the Eucharist then left without eating it. Doesn’t sound like a big deal to me but since the church says this small bread wafer becomes the body of Christ after being blessed, Catholics across the country became furious.
Not only did church members grab...
Dallas County meeting turns racial →
fuddmain:
A special meeting about Dallas County traffic tickets turned tense and bizarre this afternoon.
County commissioners were discussing problems with the central collections office that is used to process traffic ticket payments and handle other paperwork normally done by the JP Courts.
Commissioner Kenneth Mayfield, who is white, said it seemed that central collections “has become a...
Watchhow not to represent yourself in court
“Oh this is the Big One! Ahhh Lord I’m coming Pearl! IM COMING TO SEE YA!”
Louisiana Schools To Use Flintstones Cartoons As... →
(via azspot)
Toddlers who dislike spicy food racist, say report... →
The National Children’s Bureau, which receives £12 million a year, mainly from Government funded organisations, has issued guidance to play leaders and nursery teachers advising them to be alert for racist incidents among youngsters in their care.
Government sponsored agency’s are dumb.
Emergency Caller Reported Moon as UFO
Control Room: "South Wales Police, what’s your emergency?"
Caller: "It’s not really. I just need to inform you that across the mountain there’s a bright stationary object."
Control room: "Right."
Caller: "If you’ve got a couple of minutes perhaps you could find out what it is? It’s been there at least half an hour and it’s still there."
Control room: "It’s been there for half an hour. Right. Is it actually on the mountain or in the sky?"
Caller: "It’s in the air."
Control room: "I will send someone up there now to check it out."
Caller: "OK." The mystery was soon solved, as the exchange between control and an officer at the scene, makes clear.
Control room: "Alpha Zulu 20, this object in the sky, did anyone have a look at it?"
Officer: "Yes, it’s the moon. Over."
Via Neatorama
“He told the officers that it was urban camouflage”
– Local News: Man found in WI basement covered in BBQ sauce (via livejamie) (via onemoretimewithfeeling)
WTF!
Slaves to The Process - The Daily WTF →
Faith … in … humanity …. slipping……